Sunday, October 20, 2013

Blog week one of Confident Heart BUT ... I didnt' follow the subjects...Next week!

To be left... to not be seen -it’s hard for one to happen without the other--unless being seen and being known is too exposing for all.  Most people run from not only the rawness of who they are but the rawness of  of who others are.  When we are exposed to the inside of others we sometimes feel overwhelmed and responsible and retreat.  I think walking into these areas of another are what grow a lot of us because we don’t know what is coming next we don’t know what they will ask of us...what will we find out...what if we don’t like it... What will I do?  Will I face the challenge and uncertainty and pray for direction instead of leading myself (and others). Will I risk to give myself? 

In friendships- people fear someone will depend on them, need  them-  ughh what and inconvenience! What if they want me to help them all the time? What if I have to listen to them all the time?  What if I disregard all my fears and concerns move forward,waste my time to just have them shut down or walk away because they don’t feel they need me anymore.  They decide they don’t want to live life exposed in truth and I’m a reminder of that truth...who do I/have done this to myself?

In romantic relationships are worse and better...and more damaging because of it.
Too often women fantasize that the chemistry and magnetism early in relationships is special or destined or gifted...the thing we have been waiting for...and give ourselves away too soon, too much too soon... We were instructed to love the Lord God with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength...(Mark 12:30)why do we do that for someone we barely met before we are willing to do that for God?  Maybe, just maybe GOD is the friend that WE walk away from because he is the reminder of what we exposed- our hurt, pains, fears, hopes (that will never come true)- and by facing that friend every day we have to face all those thoughts...and maybe it’s just easier to walk away.  Lord help me face what ever comes my way and help me cherish my heart and the heart of others the way you do.

We so often harden from these experiences, yet we were not flogged, beaten,LITERALLY spit on with blood dripping down our bodies as Jesus was. Because he knows what that feels like,and yet he is always waiting for us no matter what... Lord thank you for strengthening me in the last 2 years to stop looking out (though I still grumble and hope) for someone to fill the feeling of being desired and comforted. Help me live with a giving heart but not a foolish one.

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